Comm. Breakdown, part 2

Setting: Workshop
Length: 1:16:23

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Occasion: This is a marriage workshop done for a church where I have a consulting relationship.

As you listen, select, copy, and paste the following outline:

Pursuing a Solution

Problem #1: Not recognizing God’s curse on the marriage
Solution #1: Understand God’s general purpose for communication in marriage

What is the essence of marriage?

The essence of marriage is companionship

Proverbs 2:16-17

Malachi 2:14

* so, the general purpose for communication in marriage is to develop that companionship

Furthermore, the specific purpose is to combat sin and its challenges
Genesis 3:16
Ephesians 4:29

Does my communication help my partner to grow in Christ?
Proverbs 16:24

To bless each other…not break each other
Matthew 7:3-5

Problem #2: Leaving the heart to its natural tendencies
Solution #2: Develop the right heart

Develop a calming response
Proverbs 15:1
Proverbs 15:4

Develop words of restoration and inspiration

Develop an other-oriented verbal and non-verbal skill

An other-oriented heart involves:

1. heart of humility , Philippians 2:1-4

2. Heart of love

* Love for the other person regulates our freedom of expression
Romans 14

Develop an other-oriented listening skill

Prov.2:2

* heart related virtues that will impact our listening
Love 1 Cor.13:7
Humility
Patience
Sympathy Rom.12:15, Heb.4:15-16

Communication (verbal, non-verbal, listening) is to be a ministry to your spouse

Problem #3. Not acquiring knowledge of my spouse’s communication style
Solution #3. Acquire knowledge of my spouse’s communication style

Acquire a general working knowledge of gender differences

* the MOTIVATION for doing this is found above in solutions #1-2

1. Seek companionship as the higher purpose
2. Develop an Other Oriented style

3 examples of an other-oriented style…
1. Develop interest in the other person’s interest
2. Adjust your content and style
3. Apologizing for sinful gender oriented approaches

* the goal of this general knowledge is to know ONE woman

Acquire specific working knowledge of yourself and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies
1 Peter 3:7
Prov. 20:5

Conclusion

The essence of marriage is companionship

“companion” = ___________________

The essence of marriage is a covenant of companionship
Prov.2:17
Mal.2:14
* communication develops this essence

Communication Breakdown, Part 1, Understanding the Problem, click:

Workshops on Communication Breakdown and Conflict Resolution should be studied together.
You will find a great deal of overlap between them.

For further insights into Genesis 4:7, click:

For further insights into Genesis 3:16, click: